Jade

Mike Posner

Met a girl, her name was Jade
 Cuts her nails with a razor blade
 Says she lives by no one's law
 Ran my pride through a big chainsaw
 Have you heard of D.B. Cooper?
 I got pulled over by an old state trooper
 I met a girl, her name was Jade
 She cut my face with a razor blade

Yeah, I screamed out in fury
 Yeah, but my cries were not heard
 Yeah, the judge and the jury
 Yeah, they could offer no cure

I met a girl, her name was Jade
 She got a brand new man and they got engaged
 The wedding's gon' be on a big green hill
 They hope it won't rain but it probably will
 The man, he was a football star
 He broke his knee, now he sells cars
 Only so much that words can do
 Love was blind, but they cured that, too
 You know, Gandhi has a son our age
 He said the freedom thing's just one big cage
 I met a girl, her name was Jade
 Her husband died, but she kept his name

Yeah, she screamed out in fury
 Yeah, but her cries were not heard
 Yeah, her mom was so worried
 Yeah, but she could offer no cure

Boss man calls for a meeting at noon
 Big cigar in an oak board room
 We got an idea and we think it's great
 Said it was too much so we're gonna try eight
 Who made love to Scarlet Jo?
 And where the hell did Josh Hartnett go?
 I met a girl, her name was Jade
 Lived her whole damn life in a mascaraed

Yeah, I screamed out in fury
 Yeah, but my cries were not heard
 Yeah, they said I'll never see 30
 Yeah, they could offer no cure

I met a girl, her name was Jade
 She cuts her nails with a razor blade